We all like to think that we are making progress in life and that we aren’t settling. Settling seems like a curse word. A word that we wouldn’t associate with ourselves. However, if we get really real…we ALL settle every day. It’s so commonplace that you think it’s how things have to be. It’s so commonplace that when you refuse to settle on something it looks radical. It’s so common that you may not even be fully ready to accept that there are areas that you settle in. I didn’t fully realize how much I was settling until I STOPPED settling.
NOW, as I look back on the progress I made, I see all the settlement offers that I tore up to shreds. I know that I deserved full consideration and a full payoff!
When you know better you do better. There are times in your life when you don’t know better so you do the things that are best for you at the time even though they may be settling. I’ve realized recently that I’ve had something in me for a while that refused to settle. If I’m going to be completely honest, I’m sometimes afraid but I always manage to push through the fear. Because it hasn’t killed me yet (although…) I keep pushing.
My first push was going away to high school far away from my family. I had considered it. I mean I was visiting campus. I knew that folks didn’t think I’d make the leap. So, what did I have to do…LEAP HARD. The same thing went for college, I always wanted to go to Princeton but it was literally down the street from my high school. I wanted to move beyond comfort and take a risk. WASHINGTON, DC! The lead me to some of the best personal relationships in my life.
So, after I got sick, the feeling and thought that I was going to settle for the status quo of my illness was ridiculous to me. When doing research, there was nothing that told me about the progress and process so let me blaze my own trail. Now, I didn’t know what this would look like. I couldn’t have anticipated the physical, mental, and emotional toll of making the decision to fight for what I was owed but I wouldn’t change that choice for anything. It’s been 5 years and I’m just now coming out of the haze and seeing how all my fight has paid off.
Refusing to settle will rarely be easy. Refusing to settle will rarely get you raucous applause in the beginning. Refusing to settle for you won’t look like refusing to settle for everyone else. You have to determine the life that you want to lead and the life that you don’t want to lead and work from there. It’s been a process but let me show you that it’s possible even against the odds.